The Prism of Loomism

Weekly Loomisms? Game on.

A prism, as you know, is a translucent optical element with a flat, polished surface that reflects light. How do the multifaceted Royals compare? Think about it.

No matter how well we play, or how solid our starting pitching is, we still have the same weaknesses as 2009. The current 2010 Royals keep getting that reflection of light of the 09 squad. Preach better defense all offseason. Betancourt blunder equals big inning. Seitzer preaches timely hitting and contact. Jose Guillen equals not clutch. Bullpen sucks. Yup. If you remember in 2009 our starting pitching began unhittable as well. You remember Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Heroes in a halfshell...turtle power! There's gonna be some major references. The weekly Loomisms are long overdue.

Game of the Week:

MLB2K10. This game is solid, and opening day 2010 was on Monday. Coinsidence? Def not. The my player mode is almost as addicting as those wonderful Starburst jelly beans. Man, am I gonna miss those. Not sure what I enjoyed more....the Tropical ones, the regulars, or the underdog...the sour ones. Hmmm. Part of me doesn't even wanna get nasty with this blog, they'd rather go deep on a nasty slider from the opposition. I digress...as per use

Beer of the Week:

This one is a bit of a surprise. I was dead set on another Boulevard product that I enjoyed throughout my wonderful weekend in KC....but then I had a taste of this familiar ale and remembered telling Hofbrewhaus that it was Oaf's bday and watching him dance it up on stage while we stood on a table and clanked heavy glass steins together. This is the light taste of summer....until Ii endulge in Sam Summer or some unbeatable Zon. Until then.....

Beer of the week is Hofbrewhaus's Hefeweisen. I enjoyed this light hoppy goodness during the Royals Opening Day loss...it made me feel a bit better about the whole sitch.

Song of the Week:

"More" by Usher. Man. Raymond v Raymond is hot. I think he wrote that "Burn" song on a previous album foreshadowing about this album. I was afraid my cd player in the 'Corde was going to bust into flames a la Simpsons style. He first unveiled this at the NBA All-Star game in Dallas. May not be the best track on the album, but it is my favorite at the moment...hence the track of the week award. I have been made fun of surely when I was dancing around while driving to this one and yelling the words. Ursh.

Loomisms of the Week:

I hit you with the ToeJam & Earl on Monday regarding B-But and A-Gord. I have another nicky for two Royals players...but I think I will save it for later...instead of the piggybank it will be placed in the hmmm not sure whats the best:

a. bacobank

b. scroogeasaurus (Ducktales...wooo hoo!)

c. Ideabox

d. Awesomairy

Yeah, so lately I've been all about getting my cook on. I like saying it and talking about how awesome I am. So from now on I will be throwing down "Getting my Emeril on" Elegant and debutant...yeah, that's how Ii get down.

So, this weekend I was over at Phil "Hollywood's" Place and we were playing the name the old school sitcom. One of us would shout one out and reminisce. I'd recommend you do that and try and name the characters it would make a sweet drinking game, like a cooler, more grown-up I never. Family Matters. Eddie Winslow. Stephon Urkel. Carl "Big Guy" Winslow...etc. Never ending night of fun... you actually don't even have to drink to play it. We didn't and we went on for hours. I just thought of one today when Ii was looking through my all time college bracket of awesome. Remember Romper Room? Mr. Do-Be what up? I think when a team is getting skunked, blown out, or utterly embarrassed it should now be referred to as Romper Room. I remember watching that on KCPT channel 19. Solid. LeVar Burton would throw down some Reading Rainbow magic around then. That guy was smooth.

Ahh, the TMNT thing? Remember the Technodrome? The think was like a giant egg of evil. It had a mouser factory inside and tons of lasers. Shredder and Krang would chill in there and hatch diabolical skeems 24-7. Then they would underestimate things and the turtles would get their hands on some pizza then it would be game over. Or Bebop and Rocksteady would screw it up. Remember how easy it was to pulverize those jokesters on the arcade game? Ii would totally own it at Showbiz. Which is what you kids today call Chuck E. Cheese. I just went into one last weekend and did work on the games. Their motto is truly correct, it is where a kid can be a kid, and I may be the biggest kid at heart any of you know. Anyways, an evil plot or scheme, if it is truly diabolical will now be referred to as Technodrome. Not sure if that fits, but its fun to say then talk about the show. Anyways, how often do u have a chance to say a new word about an evil act? All of the words for them are fun to say, dastardly? fiendish? Etc...the list goes on and on, so Technodrome just fits.

Loomism Bracket of awesome:

If you recall last week I threw down my top 17 teams of all time in college basketball and bracketized it. I love brackets. We really did get treated to an outstanding game Monday night in Indy. It seems as if college basketball is back on a level playing field. The three teams I felt were above and beyond all faltered pre final four and the level of play really didn't dip drastically. The NCAA is really throwing a Technodrome out though, opting out of the $6 billion deal with CBS to sign up with ESPN to tout a 96-team bracket. Its all about the Benji's...or the Franklins....or any type of green actually. This may ruin the excitement, but they said that back in 1985 and the tournament obviously has gained some steam.

Speaking of steam, the twin towers of Stanley the manley and Shaq bebop and rocksteady their way to victory against Hank gather's Loyola Marymount squad. trying to dribble through and around two seven foot nba stars isn't quite what they were used to in the early 90s. Their defensive strategy of hanging on them like a jungle gym doesn't prove to work as they kick out to Chris "Abdul-Rauf" Jackson as he rocks six treys.

America's team quickly dispatches the LSU team with a blend of athleticism and mid range jump shots. Shaq aka Neon Bordeux still swats 10 shots and this is when the hack a shaq technique begins, from the mind of Coach K. Man, that guy doesn't look a day over fifty. If I had to deal with all those young'ns all the time and babysit them I'd look more like Gandolf the Grey from Lord of the Rings.

The highly touted UCLA/G'town game causes three separate seizures, two by camera men trying to film Iverson and Edney run all over the place and one by Jim Harrick, UCLA's coach which causes Toby Bailey to miss a buzzer beater and George Zidek to give his best Adam Morrison impression at midcourt. Except it sounds more like "Big Z angry"

UNC outclasses Arizona as Bibby and Dickerson go cold and Miles Simon keeps trying to get Vince Carters autograph. He signs his jersey while hanging from the rim by his elbow. This is a first.

Syracuse overpowers Utah. Andre Miller and Sherman Douglas go at it and Hanno Mottola trips on his shoelace trying to guard the elusive Billy Owens. Rony Seikaly actually contains Van Horn and the Orangemen Romper Room.

The Fab Five Don't Need to worry about calling timeouts as they dispatch the Jayhawks as well. Michigan actually holds a slam dunk contest midway through the second half just to keep the audience from falling asleep. Steve fisher seems impressed.

96 Kentucky was good. Too good for Rip and the Huskies. Not even Jesus Shuttlesworth himself could overpower this team. Its like Hoosiers...with Mashburn. Unfair.

As ugly as Joakim Noah is....he can't out-ugly the Big Nasty Corliss Williamson. The best team in the past decade goes down to the trend-setting 40 minutes of hell from coach Nolan Richardson. How nasty was Big Nasty? Nastier than Noah's greasy hair...and then some....

Tarkanian leaves the towel at home as Travieso and Padilla shoot 5-31 in three point goals and Camby spends the game in foul trouble. UNLV is Romper Room, I'd be scared to see whats next!

Onto the good stuff next week. Elite Eight to Final Feezy? Maybe I'll spoil ya and just finish it off, not sure anyone was that interested in it anyways....